When meeting with parents or other members of the ARD committee, it can be a daunting task to know you’re bringing some hard information to share. Here are a few things I remember when I have to bring hard stuff to an IEP meeting.
Be Prepared – Have Your Data Ready
If you are bringing tough information to an IEP Meeting, come with your data ready. Always bring your properly collected data to explicitly state anything you need to share with the team. Whether it is present academic levels, behavior data, or anything else, you will be prepared to share the hard stuff as data collected to create a starting point to build the IEP from that point forward. I like to use paper sheets when collecting data, but others have success with online collection methods. Check out these simple data sheets if you need some tools for data collection!
Offer the Accommodations and Modifications
When you have hard stuff to share with the ARD committee, consider reminding other members that you’re there to help, not to criticize. I’ve heard parents who felt like they go into a meeting for their child and they just heard all the negatives. This can be so defeating. Frame information so that you’re sharing what a student can do as opposed to what areas they are not meeting certain standards or failing. Let them know the accommodations you’re recommending or the modifications you will put in place to be successful.
When writing Present Levels in an IEP document (in Texas), we are required to speak about what the student’s grade-level peers are working on, so I may have to write about standards that are not appropriate at all for the student. This can seem hard. In this section, I frame information in the positive; talk about what they can do. The grade-level standards are stated, and then I write in how we are accessing the same grade-level materials as any non-disabled peers. Sometimes, they access materials through accommodations and modifications, and other times it is through the acquisition of prerequisite skills.
No Opinions
During an IEP meeting when you will be sharing hard stuff, don’t give any opinions. Just tell the facts.
Be honest and share the facts without sharing any feelings or personal thoughts. It’s okay to have feelings or opinions, but when sharing hard stuff during a meeting, state things without giving any judgment or thoughts on where you feel they “should be.” Check out this IEP Binder resource to organize and prepare yourself with the facts for upcoming IEP meetings.
Sandwich Method
When sharing the hard stuff, use the tried-and-true “sandwich method.” Sandwich the hard stuff with good or positive things on either side—like the slices of bread in a sandwich. Start with things they are doing well. Talk about strengths or accomplishments- even the small ones. Then bring up the harder things.
Check out Rachel’s blog to read about 10 Things to Say at an IEP Meeting.
Kindness Goes a Long Way
Simply remember: the people in the ARD committee, especially parents or caregivers of students with disabilities are people too. They love their child and want the best for them. It will go a long way to show them that you’re there for them and that it is your job to get their child the tools they need to be successful. That’s why we do it, isn’t it?
